Seeing what's not there

Sheet. I just typed in my name and the word blog and my blog comes up. I was going to write about how my procrastination is costing me money but I recall reading how some employers are using the net to do background checks on prospective employees. So writing about this could be 'detrimental' to any future job applications.

So procrastination is not costing me money. I didnt leave applying for my kid's passport renewal so late as to require the express service and I didnt have to pay an extra $76 for the express service. And I'm pretty sure the apostrophe in kids in correct.

Ah well, the internet remembers all. So they'll now know about my car accident, my run-in with the japanese takeaway etc etc... But do hire me anyway. I work quick and am quite easy to work with! References available. Note that I am not looking for work right now.



Anyways, where was I?
Oh yes, I was saying that I've always been conflicted about eating meat. Sometimes when I chew, I can imagine the muscle and tendons that I am chomping on. And sometimes, the personality of the animal in question. Yes, yes, don't judge me. It's pretty distressing enough but I am too weak to give up meat. My best effort was a meatless 7 weeks about 10 years ago. Anyway, I read recently that some Dutch scientists are making meat in the laboratory. Isn't that cool or what? You could eat anything you like. Chicken, beef, whale, tiger, dodo, eagle, panda, giant tortoises. And all without a single animal being killed. A world without abattoirs. Now that would be worth seeing, no? And no methane problem from the cows too. Cant wait for that day. And then, I'd really go vegetarian. :-) Icky, no?

Anyway, will be eating satays (in M'sia) exclusively the next 2 weeks. Breakfast, lunch and dinner. You cannot get good satays here though this place comes pretty close.
I told the kid I'd take her to see her cousins in the U.S. next year if she'll read 10 books of my choosing. She thought about it for like 5 seconds and said "Dad, I think I'll get to go anyway so I dont think I'll be reading those books". I would have threatened to not take her but I was so flabbergasted by the reply that I just went "Uh, ah, ah, uh...". But she's right. She's going to go anyway. This is the kid who at 4 years of age asked me "When mum goes out, can I be the boss?". What makes her think her mum's the boss and furthermore, what makes her think that when her mum's out, the #2 spot is up for grabs? Creative parenting is hard. Bring back corporal punishment, I say.

*sighs*
And isnt this a pretty song? I'm still puzzled as to what instruments are used in the chorus and how they are arranged. Sufjan is a major talent. He can even make the scales sound really good.

Catch ya later.

Cleanest room in the house

is now the laundry!

[Update : Bloody blogger. It disabled comments by default! Just noticed.]

And there I was, wondering why this load of washing was taking such a long time. I then waded into the laundry and spent the next hour mopping up the results. Ah well, the mowing will have to wait another week. And it is a 20 y.o. machine. Amazing it lasted this long. But then, it wasnt used very much. :-)




Some joker has been going around and drawing faces on the heads of the figures the council put on the footpaths. Some of them look like Jack, the Pumpkin King. Much appreciated. The kid and I had a good laugh.

Speaking of, snippet of a recent conversation.

[C is doing work on the computer]
F : You know how you dont eat much chocolate anymore, cos if you start, it's really, really hard to stop.
C : Uh huh.
F : And if you've not had chocolate for a long time, you dont even miss it. And it doesnt even cross your mind to long for it?
C : Uh huh. [continues doing work on his computer]
F : And then all of a sudden, someone comes along and offers you tasty, tasty chocolate, which you initially resist but once you give in and you start consuming that sweet, sweet and oh so rich chocolate in large quantities and then just as suddenly, the supply is halted and now, you're in the situation where you lust for lashings of that luscious chocolate, almost all the time?
C: Uh huh.
[silence]
F : I wish I didnt crave now what I didnt crave then.
C: [distractedly] Uh huh.
[heavy silence]
C : [stops typing] Ummm, you're not talking about chocolate, are you?
[dog barks in the distance]
C : *big sigh*

Best song from the album.
Flaming Lips. Well, either this one or "One More Robot", which I hum more often. Mostly cos the ringtone of the reception desk in the front office sounds like the first note of the song, which then leads in to the song in my head. Hope the link still works.

And it seems this blog has lost a lot of momentum. Is there anyone who'd like to write something for it? Me? I guess. But if you would like to, let me know.

Catch you around, soon.

As Strange As You Are

Awwww crap! Is it already almost May? And April has only 30 days? Since when?
It crossed my mind to do a very terse Sex Pistols "Ever get the feeling you've been cheated" post but that would be cheating, right? After all, the purpose I blog is to treat this as a repository for my memories, which will all be lost, eventually, like footprints in the sand, snowflakes on the sill, tears in the rain.



I started listening to this song again. I think this is best song from the album. Subl may or may not agree. I must have listened to this song at least 500 times, since 1998. Funny how it makes me remember stuff that was happening around then. Personal stuff, not public events.

Anyway, I see Mandy is going to be the Australian ambassador to Italy, land of Versace, Gucci, D&G, Prada etc... Milan fashion will never be the same again. I just hope I dont have to pay another $30000 for more language lessons. That woman amuses me.





Hmmm, this is harder than I thought. And to those vicious anonymous commenters leaving messages like "its almost that time of the month again for Chai...", it does NOT help! And your unique phrasing gives you away, you little witch!

I guess I am scraping the bottom of the barrel here but did you know my mum was a teacher at the primary school I went to? Anyway occasionally, the school held plays, some of which had female characters, which isnt a problem normally except it was an ALL BOYS school. And guess who managed to snag this prized role? I wonder if having to wear my sister's dress in front of the whole frigging school affected my personal development? We will never know.

Das is alles, I'm afraid.

Ever get the feeling you've been cheated? Hey, you got a song out of it. Not a whole song? Complain, complain, complain. Leave a comment/email regd this and I'll see what I can do.

Just trying this feature.

Wrong Time, Wrong Place, Wrong Smile

Speaking of smiles, not that it bothers me in the slightest (what, me shallow?), but has anybody noticed that the presenters on Channel Nine have crooked mouths, namely Ms Fanning (who I think is pretty hot. Whoa... I didnt know she was Bernard's sister.) and their male newsreader who sometimes does the late news, might be Michael Usher.
Or maybe it is just my TV.

On to more sombre matters, I read of this totally disgusting murder. I can completely understand why the Americans are not liked over in Iraq. I wonder about the others that are not reported or caught. Would drive one to be a suicide bomber.



A Current snapshot of my life, a break from all this reminiscing that seems to be going on. So I bare to you (a snippet of) my soul, for all to see. Be kind to my nakedness.

"Meet me at the Moravia. We need to talk." Oh oh.

It's the old, old story. Droid meets droid. Droid becomes chameleon. Droid loses chameleon, chameleon turns into blob, droid gets blob back again, blob meets blob, blob goes off with blob, and droid loses blob, chameleon and droid. How many times have we seen that story?
[Apologies to Red Dwarf]

Same old, same old. I've heard them all.

* I only like you as a friend
* It's not you, it's me.
* I'm getting married in an hour, for God's sake.
* I already have a boyfriend.
* I am leaving the country.
* I need space.
* I am leaving Melbourne.
* My lesbian partner forbids me to see you any more.
* I am not ready for this
* I am married to the sea

And thus I was subjected to what I shall, from this day call the Moravian manoeveur. Ah well.

ps
One of the above reasons is NOT true.

Holy Canelloni

Doesnt that Mr. Turnbull person seem like such a nice guy? The things that flow from that mouth. I'd lose that smug look if I were him cos it might make some people want to smack him in the face. Mr Abbott should start looking over his shoulder to protect his most-smug-politician position.




Apart from raving about Pan's Labyrinth, I have nothing new to say. Go see it, if you get a chance. It's worth it, even though it is brutally violent in parts and made me look away on more than one occasion (OK, 4!). Admittedly, I am of the queasy variety. Best movie I've seen in a long time.

Am afraid I'll have to dredge something from my unreliable memory for this month's post. So technically, this could have been written ages ago. No timeliness factor here.
[will now need you to imagine the screen dissolving]

"Whoo-hooo". Finally, some real use of my Malaysian passport. No visa required for Czechoslovakia. The consulate in Australia had suggested I get it when I was in Germany. Munich confirmed I needed one but was only open like 2 hours a week and seeing as I was going to be in London. Anyway, when I tried to get one, the London consulate contradicted them. "New law. You dont need one", said London. I'd just saved AUD$60!!! SIXTY buckeroos!

That Saturday, I then drove to the Czech checkpoint at Waldhaus, armed with my visa-less passport. I'll omit the "professional hitchhikers" anecdote for brevity. The guard glanced at my passport and waved me through. Heh. I spent the rest of the day and all my money at Karlovy-Vary. They shot Casino Royale here. Real pretty place.

Anyway, happy and penniless, with my haul of Bohemian crystal, I headed back to Germany. This time, the Czech guard examined my passport, scrutinising every page and then said, "Visum?". Huh? "Visum?!" Holy shit!!! What's he talking about? What visum? Instinctively, I squeaked "Sprechen Sie Inglisch?". I could feel the sweat slide down my armpits. I was alone on this trip and would not be missed at work till Monday. My visions of spending several nights in jail accompanied by snippets of Midnight Express was interrupted by the answer I least wanted to hear. "Nein, nur Deutsch." "Oder Czech.", he helpfully added with what appeared to me to be a menacing grin. [Will need you to imagine subtitles here] Eeek!! I then slowly explained (in pidgin German and in a pitch higher than what I normally use) how the London Consulate assured me I didnt need a visa and if he double checked, he'll discover I didnt need one. Thereafter, I spilled my guts, telling him about my work, my childhood, how that shoplifting incident was really all a misunderstanding. "London give incorrect information", placing his hand on his holster. My bladder contracted.

With 40 kroner left (around AUD$2, give or take), bribery was clearly out of the question and the barricades seemed pretty sturdy, even for a speedy Ford Sierra (black, 2.0L, Stuttgart plates). The other guards had that "Why dont you try it, buddy" look, whilst caressing their automatic weapons. After holding up traffic for a few more minutes, he gave up and grinned "Next time, get a visa".
Yeh, sure, next time. I snatched my passport back while thanking him profusely (and silently prayed that they not shoot me in the back as I drive away) and when he tired of this, I quickly drove off before he could change his mind. You should have seen the other cars overtake me for fear the same thing repeated itself at the German checkpoint, which it didnt. These days, I insist on getting a visa everywhere, regardless of need.

And thus ends this month's entry. Thank you for your indulgence.
Note that the Czech republic is a great place to visit. I'd revisit it in a flash. If you'd like more travel tips, give me a buzz.